back in the saddle

it has been a while. i have been processing my heart at a snail's pace as i speed along at life's usual hectic pace. i have been inspired by many posts, well wishes, emails, and stories these past few weeks but have not had a clue as to what to say. then my mom sent me an email. it seems to fit right in with my story, my journey searching for my faith and my life right now.

i think we can tell a lot about someone by their beliefs... this piece of writing has gotten me thinking about my own beliefs and how they influence the way i live and how i can learn about myself.

as a winner of yayasmom's pay it forward contest, i need to have my own. i would like to hear from you about which belief from this writing touches a chord in your heart or rings true AND how does it influence the way you live each day. Just leave me a comment and you will be entered in my pay it forward event to win fabulous prizes! contest will end October 3rd at noon.


so happy reading...i hope this piece is as thought provoking for you as me. what do you believe?


I Believe (unknown author)

A Birth Certificate shows that we were born.
A Death Certificate shows that we died.
And, pictures show that we lived!

Now, relax.... and read this slowly.

I believe - That just because two people argue, it doesn't mean
they don't love each other. And if they don't argue, it
doesn't mean they do.

I believe - That we don't have to change friends if we understand
that friends change.

I believe - That no matter how good a friend is, they're going to
hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I believe - That true friendship continues to grow, even over the
longest distance. Same goes for true love.

I believe - That you can do something in an instant that will give
you heartache for life.

I believe - That it's taking me a long time to become the person I
want to be.

I believe - That you should always leave loved ones with loving
words. It may be the last time you see them.

I believe - That you can keep going long after you think you
can't.

I believe - That we are responsible for what we do, no matter how
we feel.

I believe - That either you control your attitude or it controls
you.

I believe - That heroes are the people who do what has to be done
when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I believe - That money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I believe - That my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and
have the best time.

I believe - That sometimes the people you expect to kick you when
you're down, will be the ones to help you get back up.

I believe - That sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be
angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I believe - That maturity has more to do with what types of
experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to
do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.

I believe - That it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others.
Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I believe - That no matter how bad your heart is broken the world
doesn't stop for your grief.

I believe - That our background and circumstances may have
influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I believe - Two people can look at the exact same thing and see
something totally different.

I believe - That your life can be changed in a matter of hours by
people who don't even know you.

I believe - . That even when you think you have no more to give,
when a friend cries out to you - you will find the strength to help.

I believe - That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent
human being.

I believe - That the people you care about most in life are taken
from you too soon.

thank you

dad's internment is in 10 1/2 hours. kevin and i are finishing off a bottle of wine in his memory so we can place the cork in the ground with his ashes. tonight i celebrate my father.

i am not looking forward to tomorrow but i know that i have so many thoughts and prayers with me. my friends and family "ROCK"! thank you for all the prayers, kind words, flowers, support, encouragement and LOVE during this time in my life. i could not do it without you. i am truly blessed for all i have.

final goodbyes

"what a God we have! and how fortunate we are to have Him! because Jesus was raised from the dead, we've been given a brand-new life and have everything to live for...including a future in heaven - and the future starts now!" 1 Peter 1: 3-4 (The Message)



dad passed today at 4:05pm. i got to be at his side with cathy as he took his last breath. i am relieved he is at peace but so sad he is gone. tomorrow starts a new road on my journey. today i will just grieve.

you can let go now daddy...

so tonight i think i said my final goodbyes to my dad. tomorrow i think he will be in heaven. he is no longer responding to those around him and his breathing is labored. what a change - from even last night. each day this week has been shocking when i walk in to spend time with him. it has been like a time travel going too fast! no wait, i am not ready!

it's weird, i think death smells like chamomile tea - i don't think i will be able to drink it anymore. or maybe when i need some "time" with my dad i should drink it to remember him. it will help remind me of the strong man he has been and how he made sure each one of his kids were ok before he left.

there is a knot in my tummy right now and i feel totally lost. somehow even with the reality of it all, i am still in disbelief that it is coming anytime.